Two Choices & Two Destines

It was back in 1982 that Dr. Kevin Lehman wrote the famous book, The Birth Order Book. Ever since then, it has been used by many people to predict what kind of a person you would be based upon what order you happen to be born in your family. And what has been found is that, remarkably, his book has been proven to be accurate. There are many teachers who mention that, just by using the Birth Order Book, she can look at the students in her class and tell you who was born first, who was born second, and who was born last. This is what he says in his book: first‑born children tend to be leaders. He points out that a disproportionate number of presidents have been first‑borns. The same is true of most of the great leaders of the military and many of the leaders of American industry. They usually have a strong sense of personal responsibility. First‑borns tend to be rule keepers, obsessed with fairness and justice. They normally have a sense of rightness and wrongness and are often very black and white in their thinking. They are also usually the keepers of the family traditions. Many of them are perfectionists, highly demanding both of themselves and of those around them. They often—first‑borns—accomplish a great deal in life because their parents have put so much pressure on them to excel.

Then we come to the middle one. He tends to be much more relaxed and laid back. Often they make friends very easily because they’re caught in the middle of the family crossfire. Middle‑borns learn how to stay out of trouble, how to compromise, how to negotiate. For them, all of life is a trade‑off. They learn how to go along and get along.

Finally, you come to us, the last‑born children. These, Dr. Lehman calls the bear cubs. They often are the court jesters who know how to diffuse tension by making a joke. They know how to laugh and make people feel good. What makes the difference between your birth order—your first‑born, your second‑born, and the third‑born? He says one crucial factor is this: parents change over the years. We start out by being very strict with our first‑borns because we don’t want to mess things up. Then we normally loosen up with the second and third child, and by the time you get down to numbers four, five, and six, your parenting becomes very relaxed indeed, which is why you often hear this phrase: “Mom and Dad let you do stuff I could not even dream about.” How many times have you all heard that? We have.

Today, we are coming to the second part of our series on the life of Jacob, From Deception to Dependence, and we are in Genesis 25:27‑34. In the story of Jacob and Esau, their order of birth as they were born would also determine what kind of people they would become, but obviously that would change a little bit as well. Moses takes us from the birth of Jacob and Esau that we focused on last week, and by the time you come to 25:27, he fast‑forwards probably about close to eighteen or twenty years—we don’t know exactly when this happens, but late teens, early twenties, probably. Moses wrote this: “The boys grew up, and Esau became a skillful hunter, a man of the open country, while Jacob was content to stay at home among the tents.” So immediately Moses portrays a night‑and‑day difference between both Jacob and Esau. Esau—a leader, a born leader, a man’s man, one who is athletic, a skillful hunter, given to doing things with his own hand. In fact, as I mentioned to you toward the end of my sermon last week, if you and I were to pick someone, you would pick Esau and not Jacob because he was a naturally born leader. He got things done. When the plumbing breaks, he is the one that you call. When you need something fixed around the house, it is Esau that steps up, and then you have the second‑born, Jacob.

The Bible uses the word “while Jacob was content.” In Hebrew, the word is actually tam, which is translated “perfect” in some other instances, but that’s not really the meaning of 25:27. It literally means he was an introvert, one who kept to himself, but also was a thinker in his life. So you have one who is a doer and you have one who is a thinker. Don’t think that Jacob was just lazy, being among the tents of his parents. Jacob was a man who analyzed things very carefully at a very, very young age. He observed things that Esau did not observe, as we will see very quickly in his story account of Jacob and Esau. But Jacob was content to be among the tents. And because of that, look at verse 28: “Isaac, who had a taste for wild game, loved Esau, but Rebekah loved Jacob.” Naturally this makes sense because Isaac loved a good barbecue, and because of that, he loved the son that could get him fresh beef and make him a good barbecue, while Rebekah loved the son who was always by her in the kitchen—the one who stayed close to her, talking to Mom when Isaac would not talk to her and giving attention to her and being that tender, loving care that Rebekah longed for. But early on in the account itself, Moses tells you the problem in this dysfunctional family that is about to get really bad, and in fact, this tendency to favor one child over the other will now go to the next generation and even the generation after that as well. It’s really a warning to all of us: while we all have certain preferences in regard to certain things toward our children, you have to be very, very careful favoring one over the other. That could be really damaging and not helpful in their lives. For those of you who have only one child, you don’t have that problem at all.

So Isaac, who had a taste for the wild game—he loved to eat—loved Esau. And remember the way Moses phrases it: the love that Isaac had for Esau was not just because he loved Esau more; he loved food, and the one who could get him that good food, he loved. So there was a reason for that attention toward, that affinity toward, Esau, and not only that—Rebekah loved Jacob. This context is already kind of a little bit messy here. Verse 29: “Once, when Jacob was cooking some stew”—later on, the Bible tells you what the stew was; it was a red lentil soup, adi paisam in a Malayalam term—“Esau came in from the open country, completely famished.” Having gone hunting as he was a hunter and spending some time, he comes back famished, and here is Jacob sitting with a stew that he had cooked. Verse 30: He said to Jacob, “Quick, let me have some of that red stew; I am famished.” And the Bible says that is why he was also called Edom, which also means “red.”

In the original writing of God’s Word, the verbs in verse 30 are piled on top of each other in the original Hebrew language; this was a very, very quick interaction that happened with them. And he is absolutely hungry. As much as you can imagine hunger—imagine that—he is coming after working very hard in the field. He comes running back, and the words that are coming out of him are filled with a great deal of urgency: “Quick, let me have some of that red stew; I am famished.” The only thing that is in my mind right now is the food that is now being cooked by Jacob. How many of you have ever made statements such as, “I cannot even see properly because I’m so hungry”? That’s the kind of hunger that Esau is facing at this time. But remember who Jacob is. Jacob is a supplanter. Jacob is introspective. Jacob is an analyzer. He had been waiting for an opportunity just like this. I don’t think this is the first time that this kind of interaction took place between them. I think many a time Jacob probably asked him the question, “What would it take for me to give you a birthright?” “I tried to grab your heel as you came out of your mother’s womb—that didn’t really work; you came out first—but I want to know, what would it take for me to have your birthright?” Look at verse 31: Jacob replied, “First sell me your birthright.”

Now, for us living in the twenty‑first century, as I mentioned to you last week, all of this talk about birthright does not mean a single thing to us. Maybe back in India it means a little bit, but here in America, who cares if you’re born first, second, or third? At least I hope it doesn’t really mean much to you. But here he is saying, “First sell me your birthright.” But why is this birthright so important to him? Remember what I mentioned to you last week: birthright afforded you double the inheritance of your father. Not only that, after the passing away of your parents, you get to have the family name associated with your name as you are now becoming the head of the household, the patriarch of the family. Now remember, even in the eyes of God, this birthright was sold on that day, because God would always identify by the firstborn—Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob—because the family name now belongs to the one who has the birthright, who is the firstborn. “Look at verse 32.” He’s exaggerating here: “Look, I am about to die,” Esau said—it’s probably been only about six or seven hours since he has just eaten—and look what he’s saying: “I am about to die.” How many times have you made a statement like that? You’re about to die. I’m about to die of hunger. No, I’m here to tell you, you can go another two weeks and you’ll be just fine. But he says, “Look, I am about to die; what good is the birthright to me?”

Again, this interaction maybe lasts—maybe—a minute here. He is very famished; he only cares about—his eyes are only upon—the red lentil soup that is now bubbling in front of Jacob, and he asks the question, “What good is my birthright?” When you come to this portion of God’s Word, I want you to understand the fact that Esau is not born in a pagan family. For the first fifteen years of his life, Esau had the wonderful privilege of listening to the grandfather Abraham, who was alive for the first fifteen years of Esau’s life, and you know what he would have heard? He would have heard stories of God’s providence. He would have heard stories of how God delivered his own father, Isaac, from the hands of Abraham himself on that mountain. Abraham would have told him stories of how God provided for him so many years, and even Isaac was born to him as a child at a very, very old age in his own life—the miraculous stories of God’s providence. How wonderful it is to serve God, how wonderful it is to receive the blessings of God—all would have been told to Esau for the first fifteen years of his life. And then, on top of that, you have Isaac, who is also a godly man, who is now mentoring him, teaching him the ways of God. I am sure many a time they’ve already told him, “Esau, you are privileged; you are the firstborn to come out of your mother’s womb—that affords you great blessings from the Lord. Double the inheritance of what belongs to us belongs to you, oh God.” But in the moment of his hunger, he is forgetting the words of his grandfather. He is forgetting the words of his father. He is forgetting the words of wisdom that have been passed on to him, and he asks that question, “What good is the birthright to me?”

How many times you and I forget the words of our grandparents? How many times do we forget the words of our parents? When given the choice between the temporal pleasures of this earth and the eternal blessings that are promised to you because you are a child of God, how many times yet you and I have made the statement, “What good is serving God for me? What good is this birthright to me?” Look at verse 33: Jacob will not give up. Jacob said, “Yep, swear to me first.” So he swore an oath to him, selling his birthright to Jacob. Jacob said, “Enough; words are not enough at this point. I know what is happening right now; I want you to swear by an oath that you are selling your birthright to me.” And there he did just that. Verse 34: Jacob gave Esau some bread and some—I’m glad he added the bread as well—and some lentil stew. He ate and drank and then got up and left. Look at the way this verse is arranged in God’s Word: gave him some bread, gave him some lentil stew, he ate, he drank, he got up, he left—but not knowing that from the beginning of that meal to the end of that meal, his destiny was completely changed in those few moments of fulfilling his hunger. When he walked away, he did not realize that everything about him—his descendants, generations to come—had immediately been changed by a decision on a matter that lasted probably for a minute in his lifetime. How consequential certain decisions can be in our lives as well.

Then the Bible gives us this great summary about what Esau did that day. Moses wrote, “So Esau despised his birthright.” The word despised over there literally means “to count as nothing,” “to treat with contempt.” To count as nothing, to treat as contempt—to Esau, his birthright was nothing; to Esau, his birthright was not important. But to Jacob, that birthright was everything, and that made all the difference in the world. A word about Jacob before I go on: the way he got his birthright was not the plan of God. God had already, remember, chosen Jacob to be a blessing; but because of this cheating, later on you will see he himself gets cheated. You don’t need to help God, by the way, by your cheating. This is like people cheating on taxes to get wealthy—you don’t need to help God to bless you materially or physically or in any other way. There are things that we have to be responsible about, but you are not called to cut corners or to cheat to help God’s blessing in your life. We are called to walk in the way God has called us to and leave the results up to the Lord. God is faithful to bring about His blessings in your life without you cutting corners, without you doing things your way to expedite the blessings of God in your life, and this was a big mistake in his life, and he will pay for it dearly later on in his life as well.

There are a lot of trades that happen in life which later on turn out to be, some, foolish. In fact, Matthew Henry, when writing the commentary on this passage, writes like this: “This was the most consequential meal since Eve ate that apple on that day.” This was the most consequential meal since the day Eve ate that meal. This was not a good trade at all. At the end of this—at the end of this meal—Jacob had the birthright; Esau had the food. In the beginning of the meal, Jacob had the food and Esau had the birthright. This was not a good trade at all. I remember the words of Desmond Tutu, who was a South African pastor, a bishop, who once said this about the white man coming and occupying South Africa: “When the white men came to our country, we had the land; they had the Bible. After years of occupation, guess what: they have the land; we have the Bible.” He was mentioning this in a funny way, but to illustrate the fact that, really, by doing what you did, you only lost your soul and you only lost any kind of a moral leverage that you had, where the Africans are the ones who turned to the gospel and not you. History is filled with bad trades, bad decisions that people will regret for the rest of their lives.

All of life is filled with choices, but there are a lot of people who make bad trades, and today—this day—Jacob, Esau made that bad trade. Let me leave you with three things as I end today in relation to this message of being aware of the choices of life. First one is this: understand the brevity of life when compared to an endless eternity. Understand the brevity of life when compared to an endless eternity. Every morning that you and I get up, there are choices in front of you—choices. Your life, that twenty‑four hours—you will never get it again. The Bible says, “Redeem that time.” What does it mean? Purchase it back for an eternal advantage that you will enjoy forever. I am guilty, just as much as you are, of wasting time on frivolous things of life. There’s a limit that needs to be in all of our lives on how much time we spend on the temporal pleasures of this earth, including sports, entertainment, and all the other things of life. Over the years, I had to cut down my sports watching even to a minuscule amount today, and that really was not a willing choice in the beginning when I’m doing it, but I had to make a choice. What would I do? What do I need to spend my time on? I know that we all get fascinated with so many TV shows and the latest release and all these things, but I want to encourage you this morning: understand the brevity of life when compared to an endless eternity. You have one life to live. You have one life to live. Every moment in that time is to be lived for the glory of God and to purchase it back for an endless eternity. Let not your eternal life be lived with regret and not knowing how you could have spent your time on earth much more valuably for the redeeming eternal things of life.

Secondly, understand the value of a human soul that will last forever. There’s a part of you that will never die. This body will be separated from that soul one day, but that inside of you—what is in there that God created in His image—will never ever die. Understand the value of that soul that will live forever. Live for that soul. Live to nourish that soul. Live to make that soul more to be like the Lord Jesus Christ. Nurture it. Feed it the things that are truly life‑giving rather than the rubbish things of this world. That is where true life is found. That is where you find the true purpose of life. That is why Jesus asked this very important question to us in Mark 8:36: “What good is it for someone to gain the whole world yet forfeit their soul?” Jesus is saying, put your soul on one balance, put the whole world on the other end, and the Creator of the world is telling you: your soul is going to be more valuable than all the treasures of this world. This also brings to mind that those who are able to bring at least one soul into the kingdom of God are more valuable than conquering all the treasures of this world.

When the Bible tells us about this account in the New Testament, it uses very strong words. Hebrews 12:16. This was not a mistake. Look at this verse: “See that no one is sexually immoral or”—the Bible says—“or is godless like Esau.” See, Esau’s mistake to us seems like a simple mistake: he was hungry, ate a meal, forgot about it. The Bible says in the New Testament—the Holy Spirit says—he was godless. Why does the Bible use the word godless to describe Esau? Nowhere in the Bible does Esau blaspheme God. In fact, some of your translators say Esau profaned God. The Bible doesn’t say that Esau ever used a bad language. Then why does the Bible use the word godless and profane to describe Esau? Because profanity in the mind of God is not the words that you speak; it is the attitude of your heart. It is where you value the things of God as worthless. So you can be within the walls of a church and be godless—do you hear me? You can be within the walls of a church and be godless—if you value less the things of God, and if you value more the things of this world, then the Bible says you are godless and profane before God—“who for a single meal sold his inheritance rights as the oldest son.” Verse 17 is so sad: afterward, as you know, when he wanted to inherit this blessing, he was rejected. Even though he sought the blessing with tears, he could not change what he had done.

So my final point is this: give importance and priority to the Lord and the things that bring you closer to Him. Understand the value of time, understand the value of your soul, give importance and priority to the things and the Lord that bring you closer to Him. That’s the only thing that really matters at the end of the day. So will we all take inventory of our lives? We all are given 168 hours in a given week. Not a single person is given a minute more, not a single person is given a minute less—168 hours in a week. Are we redeeming it? Are we using it for eternal value? Every single day you are making a choice: eat the stew or sell the birthright. Eat the stew, sell the birthright. Pray, watch Netflix. Read God’s Word, listen to some worldly music. You are making a choice every single moment of your lives. Life is filled with choices. Whenever we become too hard on Esau, remember all the times that we chose the red lentil soup over the birthright that God had given to us. But here’s the good news of the gospel: if you chose the red lentil soup in the past, my God is a God of new beginnings in your life as well. Unlike Esau, who was forever rejected by God, my God is a God of mercy and grace that is able to give you a new beginning in your life. If you have consistently chosen the red lentil soup of this world, let today be the day that you say, “I’m going to choose God. I’m going to choose His things. I’m going to choose things of eternal value. I’m going to make sure that my decisions—the things that I make—are of eternal value and not ones of regret that I need to change in the days to come.” May God, by His Spirit, help each one of us.

Let’s look to the Lord in prayer. Heavenly Father, we thank You for Your Word, Oh God. It reminds us from the story of Jacob and Esau the importance of the decisions of our life. Help us to choose wisely. Help us to make our decisions in a way that is God‑honoring and of eternal value, Oh God. We confess our sins before You when, time and time again, we have chosen the temporal pleasures of this earth over the things of eternal value in our lives, Oh God. I pray, Oh God, that our lives will be changed—that we will become people who choose the way You want us to choose. We cannot do it on our own; we ask, Oh God, for the help of the Spirit of God in each one of our lives. Thank You, Lord, for Your redeeming, sanctifying work in our lives. In the name of the Lord Jesus that we pray, Amen.